A Moment With Me, My Stories

Change

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Am lipsit o vreme lunga de pe blog si desi am tot vrut sa revin nu prea mi-am gasit vocea. S-au schimbat multe de la ultima mea postare si nu neaparat in sensul bun.

In timp ce lumea avea batai de cap cu Covid-19 si era ocupata cu discutii pro si contra despre vaccin, eu imi duceam propria lupta. Am avut cateva probleme de sanatate pe care a trebuit sa le rezolv, in timp ce iubirea vietii mele trecea prin ceva similar. Au fost … multe eventiment care s-au desfasurat intr-un timp scurt.

M-am simtit ca si cand am trecut prin iad si cand ma pregateam sa ies, mi-am pierdut tatal. L-am pierdut din nou dupa ce acum cativa ani a ales sa plece si sa isi intemeieze o alta familie. Doar ca de data asta l-am pierdut definitiv. A fost un roller coaster de emotii care a mers intr-o singura directie, in jos.

I’ve been absent quite a lot from here, wanting to return to writing but not really finding my inner voice. A lot of things have changed in my life since my last post, and not in a good way.

While the world was dealing with Covid-19 and raising its voices over vaccine pros and cons, I was fighting my battles.
I’ve had some health issues I had to deal with while watching the love of my life go through similar issues. It was … a lot to take in in such a short time.


It felt like I’d been through hell, and just as I found my way out, I lost my dad. I lost him again after he decided to leave and start a new family a few years ago. But this time, I’ve lost him for good.
It’s been a roller coaster with only one direction, down, and a hell of a ride.

Photo by Dana Sredojevic on Pexels.com

Si revenind la schimbare, de data asta nu a fost vorba de o schimbare buna, pentru ca ea poate lua multe forme. Ca acum, cand intru intr-o etapa noua a vietii. Si o fac mai puternica decat pana acum, dar si mai singura. Pentru ca nu mai e nimeni care sa vorbeasca ore intregi cu mine de la distanta despre fotbal, mancare si partea frumoasa a vietii. Despre asta vorbeam cu tata si, pentru un moment, dupa ce a murit, am uitat ca exista si o parte buna.

Iubirea m-a ajutat sa trec prin toate aceste schimbari, si puterea interioara. Dar si prietenii si gandul ca poate ne asteapta un viitor mai frumos.

Si slava Domnului ca exista muzica! A fost ceea ce m-a ajutat sa trec peste o noapte groaznica in spital, pe care as vrea sa mi-o sterg din memorie. Nu voi uita insa versurile care mi-au tinut companie. Si vreau sa inchei intr-o nota fericita, pentru ca as vrea ca cititorii mei sa zambeasca, nu sa lacrimeze cat sunt aici. Cand trecem prin schimbare cred ca trebuie sa nu uitam sa speram, pentru ca viata nu va fi doar o serie nefericita de evenimente. Este presarata cu momente de nepretuit care ne ajuta sa mergem mai departe.

Si pentru mine, unul dintre aceste momente va veni. Mai trebuie sa astept putin, pana la anul. Mai stiti muzica despre care va spuneam mai devreme? Il voi vedea in carne si oase pe artist, in 2023. Am petrecut acea noapte ascultand primele doua albume ale lui Harry Styles. Si la anul il voi asculta pe al treilea live pe un stadion, iar acest lucru e un adevarat cadou pentru mine dupa acesti doi ani, pe care abia astept sa il primesc. Probabil ca as fi mult mai trista fara muzica, si fara Harry Styles, care a castigat un loc in inima mea pentru totdeauna dupa ce a transformat o noapte urata in speranta pentru un viitor mai bun.
Voi cum treceti peste schimbarile radicale din viata voastra?

Si vreau sa le multumesc tuturor celor care au citit arhiva cat am lipsit. Va multumesc si va vad aici, alaturi de mine!

So circling back to change, it wasn’t a good change this time, and change can take a lot of forms. Like it does right now when I am entering a new stage of my life. And I am doing it stronger than ever, but also more alone, with no one to talk to me for hours, even from a distance, about football, food, and the good side of life. My dad used to do that, and for a moment after his death, I forgot all about that good side.


Love got me through these changes, and resilience. But also friends and the thought that maybe there’s a brighter tomorrow awaiting.

And thank God for music! It got me through one dreadful hospital night that I would like to forget that ever existed. But I won’t forget the wonderful music that held me company. And I want to finish on a happier note because, at the end of the day, I hope my blog brings a smile to someone’s face, not a tear. When dealing with change, I think we should rely on hope because life will not just be a series of awful events. It is sprinkled with priceless moments that help us move on.


And for me, one of those events will come. I just have to wait a bit longer, until next year. Remember the music I told you about? I will get to listen to the artist live in 2023. I got through that night by listening to the first two albums by Harry Styles. And next year, I will hear his third one live in a stadium, and it’s such a gift for me after these couple of years, one that I can’t wait to unwrap. I would probably be a lot sadder without music, even more so without Harry Styles, who won a place in my heart forever and turned a bad night into hope for a better future.
What’s your way of dealing with change?

I also want to thank every one of you that read my archive while I was dealing with stuff. I thank you, and I see you here with me!

2 thoughts on “Change”

  1. Good to hear from you, although my heart is heavy hearing about your loss. You are strong and resilient – I can hear the hope and possibility in your tone. Wishing you light and love.

    Like

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